Post by cb on Feb 22, 2004 20:09:42 GMT 10
Wagga Warfare
Well that was one 36 hours I won’t forget!
In fact I’ll always look back on this as a landmark moment in the AWF’s brief history.
Yeah we’ve gone to the country before. Sure, we’ve done three shows in three days in Sydney, Newcastle and Wollongong, but for me this one show in Wagga will always be remembered as the current line-up, the real AWF’s first tour. Quite simply put. We stayed over night… and raised HELL!
We all agree. From now on a Pub is the only place to stay. Also being old enough to remember when Tommy Lee was cool I lived out a boyhood dream and ran up and down the halls in my underpants. It was also quite hot and and the first beers barely touched the sides. We also got pissed and played Uno in the bar. Then it was while quite inebriated that MTK and I ran into each other. It was pathetic. Not only did the hits have a numb feeling that made us laugh more than anything, neither of us had the faculties to take one and still stand. Let alone swing. As a result we spent more time getting off the floor laughing and threatening each other the whole time, until we couldn’t get up anymore, but laughing like a couple of drunk idiots all the same. So after some of the worst hits we’ll ever throw, we ended up sitting on the floor, sharing a bottle of Scotch. Much to the relief of ring announcer Keiren whose room we had tried to have it out in. He had the stash after all. It was soon after we had the man across the hall leave after banging on our door to say thanks. What was I singing at the time? Billy Flyswatt and Verbal got word there was a truce drink on and joined us. Note: Billy can hold a drink, and although there was no perve value in the room at all (I was DRUNK d**n it!), their company was appreciated. Then about 2.30 we let Keiren have his room back. Well what was he going to do?!
We all knocked on TNT’s door whenever we passed it too. The only thing that stopped us going further was the prospect of returning to Sydney the next day.
Finally, was it just me, or did I see Future Shock, Webmistress and Steve Ravenous in the same bed the following morning? Sounds like a little “if you can’t beat them join them” philosophy. At least I’m sure Steve only went so far with his “hit it from behind” motto. As much as I’d welcome a conversion, there are standards to maintain.
Match 1.
Future Shock vs Steve Ravenous
Excellent opening match. As well as great exhibition of skill and athleticism, with regular feats of strength thrown in. Future Shock for his part never looked better wrestling or appearance wise, and I can’t help but wonder why he saved it for his last match. In my opinion it was the best look he’s ever had. It’s amazing what a haircut and some make-up can do. Combined with the new emblem on his vest that was colour coordinated with his make-up, it was like he’d been the subject of Queer Eye for the Straight Guy. Or Webmistress as it turned out.
He pulled out all his big moves with precision too, minus another Kamala moment, getting an inspiring amount of height from one particular standing elbow drop.
Ravenous had the big moves to answer his opponent and was looking good when he went for the pump handle slam, but aborted the pin when Webmistress climbed up on the ring apron. With Ravenous distracted Future Shocked rolled his winded body outside the ring where he grabbed a chair and climbed back in. He held the chair up to swing and with one deft movement I, me, Cochran dived through the air crying nnnnnnNOOooooooo, seizing the chair and throwing it down to the outside floor. It was then I realised the speed at which I was moving, and that I was already over the top rope, and about to land on the chair. Ouch!
When I got back in Future Shock was making the cover and he got the win.
Match 2.
Kid Dynamite vs Billy Flyswatt
Let me put it this way,
KD LOST. KD LOST. KD LOST. KD LOSTSounds like a lesbian country singer doesn’t it… kd Lost.
Billy rolled him up backwards from a camel clutch position which was once again, a credit to professional wrestling.
Match 3.
Mad Tony Kebab vs Dan Hansen.
A bloody massacre.
Dan’s whip was no match for MTK with a full arsenal of weapons. Plus Kebab likes pain. He also continued top be the only hardcore wrestler in the world to never bleed in a match!!!
Kebab dominated from beginning to end, and when he got the axe handle wrapped in barbed wire off Dan, it was over. He then hand cuffed Dan to the top rope and attacked him with a chair. He later claimed he “took pity on Dan and wanted to toughen him up.”<br>Tough love, Kebab style.
Match 4.
Future Shock and Webmistress vs Steve Ravenous and Gravity
Claiming interference in the earlier match (what the f…?) and with Teenwolf unconscious back stage following an altercation with Chris “Verbal” Kelly, this match was changed from Gravity vs Teenwolf to a tag encounter.
The highlights of this match were Webmistress, who picked her spots expertly, body slamming Gravity, and the chemistry as a team between Gravity and Ravenous.
Whether it was because he carried most of the load for his team or because he changed outfits and no longer coordinated with his make-up, Future Shock found himself not only out of rhythm, but between a “rock” and “Gravity” as well. The pump handle slam followed by a swanton finished him off.
Match 5.
TNT vs Mark Hilton
There was intensity and intent, impacts and innovation, artistry and just plain ugly. In short this match pushed the envelope. Hilton’s big moment brought out moves that made his standard routine look, well, standard, and although his pants weren’t as tight as I’ve become accustomed, the new look only enhanced his credibility. Although not as intimidating as one look at TNT. He was definitely main event material. Which is just reward for being exploited over first match heat so many times.
The highlights included TNT’s best moonsault to date, Hilton’s backflip out of the corner after being flung in, TNT’s plancha over the top rope onto Hilton, the stunning combination of counter wrestling that finished with a diamond cutter by Hilton, and then the splash I received in the corner from him as well. Mmmm!
I learnt here to never to rest one’s head on the mat while there is still wrestling going on. The next big bump on the mat knocked me out, which is definitely not what TNT planned I’m sure. I wasn’t down and dazed. I was OUT!
When I came around there was a flying Hilton landing a shooting star press.
I know my job. 1,2,3.
Hilton won.
Well that was one 36 hours I won’t forget!
In fact I’ll always look back on this as a landmark moment in the AWF’s brief history.
Yeah we’ve gone to the country before. Sure, we’ve done three shows in three days in Sydney, Newcastle and Wollongong, but for me this one show in Wagga will always be remembered as the current line-up, the real AWF’s first tour. Quite simply put. We stayed over night… and raised HELL!
We all agree. From now on a Pub is the only place to stay. Also being old enough to remember when Tommy Lee was cool I lived out a boyhood dream and ran up and down the halls in my underpants. It was also quite hot and and the first beers barely touched the sides. We also got pissed and played Uno in the bar. Then it was while quite inebriated that MTK and I ran into each other. It was pathetic. Not only did the hits have a numb feeling that made us laugh more than anything, neither of us had the faculties to take one and still stand. Let alone swing. As a result we spent more time getting off the floor laughing and threatening each other the whole time, until we couldn’t get up anymore, but laughing like a couple of drunk idiots all the same. So after some of the worst hits we’ll ever throw, we ended up sitting on the floor, sharing a bottle of Scotch. Much to the relief of ring announcer Keiren whose room we had tried to have it out in. He had the stash after all. It was soon after we had the man across the hall leave after banging on our door to say thanks. What was I singing at the time? Billy Flyswatt and Verbal got word there was a truce drink on and joined us. Note: Billy can hold a drink, and although there was no perve value in the room at all (I was DRUNK d**n it!), their company was appreciated. Then about 2.30 we let Keiren have his room back. Well what was he going to do?!
We all knocked on TNT’s door whenever we passed it too. The only thing that stopped us going further was the prospect of returning to Sydney the next day.
Finally, was it just me, or did I see Future Shock, Webmistress and Steve Ravenous in the same bed the following morning? Sounds like a little “if you can’t beat them join them” philosophy. At least I’m sure Steve only went so far with his “hit it from behind” motto. As much as I’d welcome a conversion, there are standards to maintain.
Match 1.
Future Shock vs Steve Ravenous
Excellent opening match. As well as great exhibition of skill and athleticism, with regular feats of strength thrown in. Future Shock for his part never looked better wrestling or appearance wise, and I can’t help but wonder why he saved it for his last match. In my opinion it was the best look he’s ever had. It’s amazing what a haircut and some make-up can do. Combined with the new emblem on his vest that was colour coordinated with his make-up, it was like he’d been the subject of Queer Eye for the Straight Guy. Or Webmistress as it turned out.
He pulled out all his big moves with precision too, minus another Kamala moment, getting an inspiring amount of height from one particular standing elbow drop.
Ravenous had the big moves to answer his opponent and was looking good when he went for the pump handle slam, but aborted the pin when Webmistress climbed up on the ring apron. With Ravenous distracted Future Shocked rolled his winded body outside the ring where he grabbed a chair and climbed back in. He held the chair up to swing and with one deft movement I, me, Cochran dived through the air crying nnnnnnNOOooooooo, seizing the chair and throwing it down to the outside floor. It was then I realised the speed at which I was moving, and that I was already over the top rope, and about to land on the chair. Ouch!
When I got back in Future Shock was making the cover and he got the win.
Match 2.
Kid Dynamite vs Billy Flyswatt
Let me put it this way,
KD LOST. KD LOST. KD LOST. KD LOSTSounds like a lesbian country singer doesn’t it… kd Lost.
Billy rolled him up backwards from a camel clutch position which was once again, a credit to professional wrestling.
Match 3.
Mad Tony Kebab vs Dan Hansen.
A bloody massacre.
Dan’s whip was no match for MTK with a full arsenal of weapons. Plus Kebab likes pain. He also continued top be the only hardcore wrestler in the world to never bleed in a match!!!
Kebab dominated from beginning to end, and when he got the axe handle wrapped in barbed wire off Dan, it was over. He then hand cuffed Dan to the top rope and attacked him with a chair. He later claimed he “took pity on Dan and wanted to toughen him up.”<br>Tough love, Kebab style.
Match 4.
Future Shock and Webmistress vs Steve Ravenous and Gravity
Claiming interference in the earlier match (what the f…?) and with Teenwolf unconscious back stage following an altercation with Chris “Verbal” Kelly, this match was changed from Gravity vs Teenwolf to a tag encounter.
The highlights of this match were Webmistress, who picked her spots expertly, body slamming Gravity, and the chemistry as a team between Gravity and Ravenous.
Whether it was because he carried most of the load for his team or because he changed outfits and no longer coordinated with his make-up, Future Shock found himself not only out of rhythm, but between a “rock” and “Gravity” as well. The pump handle slam followed by a swanton finished him off.
Match 5.
TNT vs Mark Hilton
There was intensity and intent, impacts and innovation, artistry and just plain ugly. In short this match pushed the envelope. Hilton’s big moment brought out moves that made his standard routine look, well, standard, and although his pants weren’t as tight as I’ve become accustomed, the new look only enhanced his credibility. Although not as intimidating as one look at TNT. He was definitely main event material. Which is just reward for being exploited over first match heat so many times.
The highlights included TNT’s best moonsault to date, Hilton’s backflip out of the corner after being flung in, TNT’s plancha over the top rope onto Hilton, the stunning combination of counter wrestling that finished with a diamond cutter by Hilton, and then the splash I received in the corner from him as well. Mmmm!
I learnt here to never to rest one’s head on the mat while there is still wrestling going on. The next big bump on the mat knocked me out, which is definitely not what TNT planned I’m sure. I wasn’t down and dazed. I was OUT!
When I came around there was a flying Hilton landing a shooting star press.
I know my job. 1,2,3.
Hilton won.